As I sit here on this not so beautiful gloomy and cold Sunday Morning, I reflect on everything that has led me to this point. How did I get where I am today? And most importantly, where do I go from here?
Almost five years ago, I had a very strict opinion about life. My goal was to be self obsessed with my goals and career choice. I had a strict set of goals that I had to accomplish and a clear road map to success. Getting married and having children were the last thing that was on my mind…Actually, it was. At 20, I could be considered a compulsive boyfriend-er. I had to be in a relationship to be happy. After several very unhappy endings to my love stories, I swore to focus on myself and swear of marriage and children all together. So I did the only reasonable thing that a 20-year-old self-obsessed young lady would do, I ask my OBGYN for a hysterectomy. My heart was then crushed by the words “No, you might want children someday.” I told him how ridiculous that was because I was too driven and focused for that but he didn’t go for it.
I spent the next several years in college joining many student organizations, volunteering in the community and avoiding any type of committed relationship. Until I got a phone call from one of those failed love story participants that I mentioned earlier.
A little background about the little red head that stole my heart in the 9th grade. He was the typical class clown, funny guy that always wanted to be cool and stand out. You know, the kind of guy that every girl is attracted to but usually have the sense not to marry. This one is particular was what I considered “the one” but we dated in high school which is not a good time to be determining who “the one” will be. We were voted “Best Couple” in high school and were that couple that people could not believe didn’t stay together.
When he called me after not speaking for four years, I couldn’t believe it. We got together and that’s when he professed he love for me once again. Well this time he meant it. We dated for eight months and were married on May 19, 2009.
This is when the story gets juicy…
As we planned for our small, small budget wedding, I was in a hurry to lose 5 lbs to fit into my dress. The more I exercised the better I felt physically. Three days before our wedding, I bit into an apple for lunch and almost threw up. I couldn’t remember when I last had my period so I decided to clear my mind by taking a pregnancy test to make me feel better. How many of you ladies reading have taken a pregnancy test just so it can reassure you that your not, right? Well this one did not.
I immediately burst into tears. I didn’t want people to think that we were only getting married because I was pregnant. But people are going to think what they want and I learned to accept that. My beautiful baby boy was born on Christmas Eve, December 24, 2009, one month early but completely healthy. I was very lucky and blessed.
Since he was born, I have started realizing what is really important apart from taking care of him. Sleep.Coffee.Love. Those are the most important things to me now. Sleep is always important to any new parents because you don’t get much of it anymore. Coffee is my main source of energy these days since I started working again. (don’t worry, I don’t breast feed.) Love is so important because when you are struggling new parents, it’s the only thing that gets you through it. I have learned that love comes from not just your husband but your all your family members, your friends, your in-laws, your neighbors, your co-workers even the women in the grocery store line that offer little bits of good advice. Love comes in so many different forms and it surrounds you when you need it. All you have to do it be open to it.